anxiety, a tremor underneath my skin, a background hiss like static, like unearthed electricity. it waits, with its little barbed hooks, ready to latch on to the slightest disturbance and surround it, making it bigger, louder, more insistent and frightening and I don't know how to stop it. it prickles and shivers and makes my hands shake and my legs twitch to a rhythm I can't hear. I don't know how to simply exist-- that's all I want, just to be. to feel at peace. still and quiet, not humming and whirring with untapped energy that goes nowhere and does nothing but make me afraid to be alive.
